Adversity is subjective. Perseverance, however, is not. Frankly, it does not matter what it is. In the long run, you can persevere through anything: perseverance through adversity! It doesn’t matter if it is perseverance through grade school or college, a lousy job, or a badly reviewed movie! This is very important to remember that adversity looks different to everyone based on life experiences. Adversity changes from age to age as well. In today’s world and today’s kids, adversity and struggle is putting their device or video game down for twenty minutes. Sometimes it’s real, though… Kids have some real hangups! Sometimes hard to see through their misgivings of the world.
I know this from two perspectives, one as a child born with cleft lip and palate and two through physical adversities through my upbringing and military experiences. Through all of this, I have learned to cope with divorced parents, step-parenting, school, and the military. I have known to be positive as I can be throughout my life. This is what I want for my family!
Not That Parent
Though it is hard at times to see what people are missing in their lives and the adversities they face because of our own life experiences, we often focus on the negativity of a role. We often forget that even in adverse situations, positivity can also happen! Our life experiences define what our outlook appears to be. People do not always agree on handling situations because they have experienced them separately and with different nuances. In my case, while not a helicopter parent, I do watch out for my children and often try to stretch their fibers. If they are being disrespectful to a teacher, the benefit of the doubt, for me, goes to the teacher because I was a kid once too! If there is a misgiving or something does not jive with stories told on both sides, I start to look at the behaviors of the “offender” verse the “perpetrator.” I analyze and interpret what I am perceiving, and I will talk to my wife to see if I am off-base. I admit, sometimes I am so far off base that the home run was scored off of a walk. Instead, I am fallible.
He’s That Kid
My oldest son and namesake, Kenny William Lee, has been having some growing pains this year. If you have followed my blog, you know I have high expectations for him! Kenny’s athletic ability, while natural, is often trounced by his need to practice and learn. He has no problem practicing, actually loves to get better at things! His musical ability, we have said, from the beginning of his life has always been exemplary. Sarah and I often would say, “If he does not end up doing something in music, we have failed as parents!” He has the ability, talent, and tenacity to put in the work! All that being said, Kenny loves music. This year at school, he is a first-year band student; even though he has been playing the drums for 8 years already, he loved music till he started band class. He has been the kid that all the teachers see in him his love for music, but that is not enough.
Kenny thought percussion was what he would do because of his love of drumming, and that he is awesome at it! Trust me I do not tell him this because I don’t want his head to get bigger than it already is! His teachers didn’t have time to teach the xylophone. He was distraught, and because he was distraught, he was not being the most respectful kid that he usually is. Kenny is not the type of kid that gets disruptive and makes a scene. He takes things in, and he internalizes everything. He gets quiet and just stops responding or doing anything. This has happened a few times over the 2022-2023 school year. We have spoken to the principal and the teacher about this. We gave them helpful ways to get through to our son.
Helpful Ways
Little Kenny is very much my mini. He shuts off the world and doesn’t respond. He doesn’t overreact once adversity sets in, but he does try to persevere on his own. Kenny has learned that, through his own reflection, if he stays silent that he will not get into as much trouble. However, all this being said. Kenny has stopped enjoying music while preparing for school shows. Now that ISSMA is finally done, Kenny has allowed himself to fall in love with music again!
Kenny is the one who plays the xylophone in this video. By the way: they took a Silver Medal Rating. (I really have no clue what that means…)
On To Fun Perseverance through Adversity
Now last night Kenny allowed himself to have fun with music again; he challenged me to a drum off! Naturally, I won! But in my heart, he won because he persevered through an adverse time in his life and still has a zeal for what he loves!
Kenny has done so well; he quickly picked up drumming again and started it all back again! I am so very proud of this young man! If you see him around, please let him know that he is so special and loved and that perseverance through adversity is quite amazing and excellent!
Until next time:
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